Friday, June 18, 2010

Today was a good day.

Every time Shae goes to sleep we say our prayers. It goes like this...

"Now I lay me down to sleep I pray the Lord my soul to keep. God Bless Mommy & Daddy, Shae Shae, Shyloh & Tyce, Charlie....." and continue to name off the rest of our family.

Today was the first day I was able to say the prayer without crying. ;o)

Every morning I wake up and my prayer is that the Lord give Shyloh & Tyce a hug and tell them how much I love them.

Although my body is a constant reminder of the babies no longer in my womb I am slowly able to rejoice again. Shyloh and Tyce, as tiny as they were, made such a difference. Isn't that every mother's dream? My little quarterback & linebacker made an impact far greater than I will ever truly know.

It's funny. People have thanked me for fighting so hard... Trying and doing everything we could to help Shyloh and Tyce. THAT was the easy part.

Have I mentioned that God is SOOOO GOOD? He gave us this beautiful blond little girl that needs her Momma to wake up every single morning..... usually so we can watch cartoons and eat a fruit snack ;o) I can't sit around and have a pity party. God gave me her little laugh to help patch some of the cracks in my heart. I know I've shared this verse before, but it is SOOOO comforting to me. James 1:17 Every good and perfect gift is from above.

I'm sorry if this is rambling... These are just some of the thoughts I needed to get out and release.... Thank you to everyone that reads our blog. Thank you for your kind words, encouragement and prayers. I promise I will reply to all of you, I'm just not quite ready yet. But, know that I did start reading them and am SOOOOO touched by each and every one of you.....

God's timing... I have a friend from 10th grade that I used to play basketball with that I haven't talked to in YEARS... Well, we became friends on facebook and she read my blogs and she sent me the sweetest card and an AMAZING book when she read that Shyloh & Tyce had gone to heaven. This book brought me such comfort on one of the saddest days of my life. And to think God knew all along why she was apart of my life.... not so we could play JV basketball together in 10th grade.... but because he had something much bigger planned 11 years later. His grace is amazing!!

4 comments:

Rorirose01 said...

I'm so proud of you Nay Nay! Not only for your strength and beautiful heart, but for that fact that you still eat fruit snacks while watching cartoons... make sure you get a glass of sweet-tea and tell Shae Shae "Look, I made you breakfast!" Love you!

Unknown said...

I love you and pray for you everyday. If everyone had just a little bit of your faith in God....what a beautiful world this would be.
;)

Jessica said...

I am glad you are able to rejoice again. God is good and we can do ALL things through Him and His strength. It is amazing the strength and beautiful heart you are exhibiting in the midst of pain. I look back on my journey then and now with losing my babies and I know God is the only reason I could go through all of this and come out on the other side still praising Him. Praying for you!

Brittz said...

Thank you all for your kind words. We appreciate your sentiment.